Good Reality TV?

I dated a guy in high school who knew he was smarter/more sophisticated/generally better than everyone else.  This attitude came up frequently with his parents, especially his mom, who *gasp* enjoyed reality TV shows.

I'll admit that I can be a bit of a reality TV junkie as well.  I avoid Big Brother and Survivor on principal, but it's the rare episode of The Biggest Loser that doesn't make me cry.  And home improvement shows (Property Brothers, Love It or List It, Design Star) - let's just say I'm going to have some very high expectations in the coming decade.

No one, and I mean NO ONE has ever really complimented reality TV on anything; it's a very warped version of "reality," they (generally) have little educational value, and as Jersey Shore taught us, they make superstars out of people who honestly just need to melt back into the primordial ooze and please don't reproduce any farther.

But is there such a thing as good reality TV?  I personally love finding new exercises on Biggest Loser, and those design shows make me drool, but there's more to it than that.  Lately, I've been watching a show called Surviving the Cut on Netflix.  The show is an exploration of the U.S. military's most rigorous training courses and follow classes of Special Forces wannabes as they get mentally and physically torn apart to prepare for the toughest jobs any of us regular humans can imagine.

So let's think about this: it's a series that shows selected, dramatic excerpts of a typical day in the lives of a specific group of people competing to win a coveted rank - reality TV in a nutshell.  And yet, somehow, it seems different.  Is it because the series comes from the Discovery Channel?  Is it because the participants are good, selfless people?  Or is it just that most of us wouldn't deign to call the U.S. military "useless entertainment"?

Your call.

Find, Apply, Repeat

For the last few weeks, I've been in "get it together" mode.  Which, as a recent grad, basically means trying to find a job that I can actually be excited about.  And one which, possibly, will mean that I can pay back my student loans AND eat more than Easy Mac for every meal (just kidding, I hate Easy Mac).  I should note that there is nothing painfully wrong with my current job; it's just that I'm currently only part time and minimum wage, so I'm feeling the pinch in more ways than one, and this isn't something I can picture building the rest of my life on.

So I'm in the cycle of applying for jobs, and there are a few things I will never understand.  Why do I have to fill out a full job history and include a resume?  How long do I wait before I assume you laughed reading my materials and threw them in the discard pile?  What exactly is the magic formula for filling out the "Salary Requirements"?  And why are you not required to give me a reason for saying no?

Yes, I started my Round I'm-Not-Even-Counting-Anymore search with finding my dream job - and I didn't get it.  Unfortunately, I discovered this information in the midst of a personal crisis and the day before my next application was due, an application for a very similar, very dream job-esqe position.

So the question isn't really "how do I keep doing the same process over and over" or "how do I make myself more appealing," it's "how do I not lose faith in myself when no one else seems to have it?"  I always thought there was a direct line between my dreams and me - work hard, stay honest, study a lot, be rewarded.  But somewhere between Summa Cum Laude At My Top Choice School and Everything I Really Want, I got derailed.  Maybe it's my fault for chasing a dream that got changed half-way through, or maybe it's just part of the process and all my fellow graduates who seem to have it together are just hanging out in the faux-green grass.

The only thing I know for sure is that I just need one chance.  Give me a chance, and you will find that the only thing I know how to give is all.

Summer Reading, Part Three

This hasn't really come up before, but I'm a historical junkie.  I love pretty much any story that involves people wearing corsets, or wars that have already happened (don't get me started on my WWII obsession), or immigrants.  If the story takes place between, say, 1500 and 1975, I will read it or watch it.

But I also love a really witty story.  I had a theatre professor who once described theatre as "real life, only better," and that's what I want from a story.  I want main characters who have those perfect comebacks on the tip of their tongue and always have more brass than I have ever had.

Enter Deeanne Gist.

The first book I read by Ms. Gist was A Bride Most Begrudging.  It's an amazing story about a noble English woman put on a ship and sold as a "mail order" bride to a man in early Virginia.  Of course, it ends with love and all kinds of great gooey stuff, but the part that got me was an encounter with a skunk.

I digress.

This summer, I read Gist's newest book, It Happened at the Fair.  The story is set at the 1893 Chicago World's Fair.  It involves the history of ASL, Alexander Graham Bell's School for the Deaf, the history of fire sprinklers, and the sights, sounds, and events of the World's Columbian Exposition.

If you pick the book up at Walmart (not that you need to do so),

 you'll also get a sneak peek of her next book!

Holy Hannah.  The research put into this book is fabulous.  I honestly don't know if I did this much work my entire four years of college.  Okay, I did, but still.  The descriptions and photos included in the novel, set a beautiful scene.  Even though Gist admits in her Epilogue to changing certain facts to fit her story, she creates a detailed list of the actual events and her version.

The plot line keeps you turning the page as well.  The story centers around a man who wishes to sell his invention, an automatic sprinkler system, but is held back by his steadily declining hearing and the stigma surrounding deafness.  Enter in a beautiful woman, who can teach the inventor to read lips so no one will know his trouble - but of course, it's just not that simple.

If you're a history junkie like me, you have to pick up this book.  Everyone knows stories of the Civil War and the Great Depression, but how many books can you find about the suppression of sign language teaching and ways to fight fires?  Grab it now, and the 400 pages will keep you busy for a while.

Music Playlist, July 15th

I'm a music junky.  I will listen to basically anything that isn't heavy metal or rap (and even those are negotiable), so my life revolves around what's on my iPod and the music I'm relating to in the course of any given day.  Every now and then, I'll be posting a list of 5-10 songs that are on my mind.  Some of the lists will be themed, others will just be random.  So Google away, and I hope you find some new music that you love!

This is not me.  I am not that photogenic.

1. "Love to Burn" by Cory Lee/Alexz Johnson - This is a great song with a sultry R&B/jazz sound.  From the Canadian TV show "Instant Star," the song was originally sung in season three by the main character, played by Alexz Johnson.  On the soundtrack, however, the song is done by a co-star, Cory Lee.  I am of course biased towards Johnson's version as it was the original and plays a great part in an on-screen romance, but the song fits Lee's voice perfectly.  Perfect for: when you've got a guy that won't commit, you're looking for a bedroom soundtrack, or you're in the mood for romance.

2. "Drink, Swear, Steal, and Lie"  by Michael Peterson - Straight from the '90s, this song is one of those upbeat, not-really-mushy love songs.  The title might be a little deceptive, but that's because the lyrics are just a little bit punny.  For an English geek like me, that little bit of language humor is a real grab.  Perfect for: dancing around with the mop when you're supposed to be cleaning.

3. "1980" by Rehab - Full disclosure, this is a rap song (I said it was negotiable), and I've been listening to it pretty much nonstop since I got back from my vacation at the end of May.  When you find it online, it will say explicit, but the only explicit language is one use of "shit" and one use of "ho" BUT in the context "she ain't no ho." (I know, my grammar senses are tingling).  Overall, this is one of the cleanest and most positive mainstream rap songs I have ever heard, which is why I can stand to listen to it.  It's a love song, and a sweet one at that.  Plus, Rehab gets tons of credit from me for being able to use the phrase "pizzazz and jazz" in a rap song.  Perfect for: people who like the rhythm and beat of rap but can't stand the violence and misogyny that usually comes with.

4. "Perfect Day" by Lady Antebellum - Title pretty much says it all, plus this group is hugely on top of the music world right now.  Perfect for: anyone who needs a reminder to slow down and/or enjoy the little things in life.

5. "Blinded" by Third Eye Blind - Okay, so this song has a fair amount of innuendo, and it's all about a couple with on-off sexual issues, but I really like it.  It's totally '90s and has a great beat.  And, honestly, every girl wants a guy to be this enraptured by her.  Perfect for: scratching that nostalgia itch.

What are the songs filling your ears this week?  Share in the comments - I'm always looking for new music!

Moving Home

Let's face it.  There is a huge (somewhat joking) stigma about young adults who move back home after college.  A Pew survey from 2011 reported 53% of 18-24 year old moved back in with their parents, at least temporarily.  And with everyone from bloggers to Huffington Post and the Wall Street Journal throwing in their two cents, it seems like the horse is getting beaten to death over and over again.

I sympathize with both sides, I really do.  As a recent grad, I totally get the frustration and stress that comes with no income, high debt, and suddenly finding yourself back in the strange rut that you left years before, usually glad to see it go.  But I also completely understand how, for parents, there is suddenly another mouth to feed, more laundry, more utilities, more people fighting over the remote, and just a general stress that comes with having another adult with a totally different way of life.

Moms and Dads, let me clue you in, though.  As much as you may think we kids are looking forward to coming back home footloose and fancy free, for most of us, it sucks.  Not because we're broke, or because we can no longer make 2am runs to McDonalds without being looked down upon, or because we're sleeping on the Superman sheets we bought at 13.  It's because, at some point, the words "you live in my house" come into play.

Don't get me wrong.  I understand that it is your home, you pay most of the bills, and you have the right to set ground rules.  But a sentence like that only serves to antagonize and trivialize.  Antagonizes because it reminds us of all the ways in which we currently come up short - in debt, under- or un- employed, back in the nest; trivializes because it suggests that we are not allowed to have an opinion/our opinion is invalid because we haven't fit the mold of "success."

There has to be a better way.  Living at home doesn't have to be painful or cause a million regrets.  We all need to learn to talk to each other with love, and then maybe the process of getting on our feet won't feel so wrong.

Personal Responsibility

Over the weekend, a (assumed) drunk driver ran his/her vehicle into my grandmother's house.  Into the house.  Went through the ditch, into three trees, a flower bed, and the house, leaving tire tracks and a gaping hole, not to mention an exposed underground cable and broken plumbing and electricity in his wake.

And then, with the truck still slammed up against the house, the culprit ran off.

To me, the idea of running away irks me even more than the accident.  There have been a rash of hit and run accidents around my hometown, and it pisses me off.  Don't get me wrong, I can understand being scared of the consequences.  I can't imagine how scared I would be if I were in the same position.

I'm not saying I'm the best about taking responsibility for my actions.  I've been known to tell some white lies, and it's something I'm working on.  And even thought I admit there is a big difference between not telling someone you ate the last cookie and leaving the scene of an accident,  I see a relationship between the two.

It's all about responsibility.  Where is the line between a white lie and a gross misdemeanor? What are the signs of a bigger issue?  

How do we get it back?