New Year, New Chances - Giving with Goals

New Year's Resolutions get such a bad rap.  I mean, you can't really blame them, with how quickly they fall by the wayside.  I personally don't like the word "resolution."  I prefer goals.

There are some secrets to the art of goal-making and goal-keeping.  When it comes to goal-making, keep in mind that it isn't just a year in broad terms.  What do you want to accomplish this week?  This month?  What about today?  A combination of short-term and long-term goals keeps you from becoming overwhelmed.  Don't just think about how you want your life to be different at this time next year, think about what you need to change now to improve your life and your attitude.

Goal-keeping.  It's cliche, but write them down, and put the list somewhere you will see it (posting it on a shelf in the linen closet isn't going to cut it).  If you have a love of Pinterest like I do, create a Vision Board and pin pictures that represent your goals.  Move the board to the top of your profile page, and you'll see it every time you look for a pin.  And if you do have some long-term goals, break them down into smaller chunks.  If you want to save $500 for a new gadget by the end of the year, remind yourself how much you have to save by the end of each month and you'll be more likely to succeed without pulling your hair out or living on Ramen from October on.

But don't just think about yourself.

This time of goals and renewals is the perfect time to move out of the self-absorbed shells we all seem to carry around these days.  Make a commitment to yourself to do something better, to give back for your blessings (and if you have a computer to read this, I know you are blessed).  Is there a charity that tugs at your heart?  Make a goal to give to them in some way, whether it is with money or your time or something else entirely.  Are there people in your life you could use friendship and support?  Set your heart on taking time out to bless them with your presence, digital or in-person (put an emphasis on in-person).

My 2014 Goal #1 is to donate blood more frequently.  Giving blood is so easy.  If you've never done it, I really suggest you try it at least once.  It's not as scary as you might think, and it doesn't take long at all.  It takes no money, and it saves lives.  It doesn't get much better than that.  Start here to find out more.

Give of yourself.  You'll feel better about yourself, and that we keep you on track with your goals.

Cross-stitch on the Go

I find it absolutely impossible to sit still.  Even watching TV or Netflix, I have to be doing something with my hands (fact, I'm typing this in one tab with The West Wing playing in another).

I always keep some sort of busy work close, and though in the past years it was typically homework, in the seven months since graduation, I have begun keeping books and crafting supplies at hand to stave off my boredom and penchant for napping when I'm bored.

Small cross-stitch kits like these are available at tons of stores including Walmart, Joann Fabrics, and Michael's.  The kit itself is the perfect size, easy to transport and small enough to keep everything in your lap if you're watching a movie or riding in a car.  I like to store all the pieces of the kit, plus a scissors, in one of these pencil pouches.  They're just big enough to keep you busy for a bit, and they're relatively inexpensive.

But what to do with the finished product?  My favorite use for these small pieces is to use them as gift tags; I just attached the little bunnies to a Christmas present I mailed to a friend.  A handmade tag like this is a great way to make a gift-recipient feel special, and a myriad of designs make grabbing one from a stockpile easy.

Student Loan Control

May graduates hit a trap.  And that trap is in the form of "your first loan payments are due RIGHT before Christmas."

So while we all take a moment to feel sorry for ourselves and freak out that there is absolutely no way we've been out of school for over six months already, I'm going to share something that will make you feel less like one of the poor people on the Titanic.

The point of the website I've shared (click the hyperlink, people, I made it easy) is largely to help you estimate how much your loan payments will be.  Yes, I know, your loan servicers are doing that for you, but hang with me for a second.

The bottom half of the loan calculator (which looks like this, for those who still haven't been convinced to click the link)

has a section where you can experiment with what will happen if you pay more than the minimum, whether it be once, once a year, or monthly.

Now most of us who are buried under student loans ($51k - I know what I'm talking about) feel like the minimum payments are a stretch, and the little extra we could maybe eke out every month isn't going to change much.  But read on and take heart!

One of my (many) loans has a calculated monthly payment of about $39, but the contract I signed mandates I pay at least $50 a month.  So, in essence, I am paying an extra $11 a month.  By adding that $11, I will pay off this particular loan 51 months early.  That's over four years of my life without payments, all for the cost of a restaurant pizza.

Gather up your loan info, click the link, and get yourself in control of your debt.  If one less night of half-price apps with your friends or one less bottle of wine a month can give you a few loan-less years, it's so worth it.  Calculate and recalculate until you find what's going to make an impact on your life!

Distance

I have a lot of perspective on distance.

I think of distance differently, having grown up in a rural area.  When I was growing up, there was no running down the street to play with a friend.  You didn't just run into town when you were craving some Milk Duds, and making sure there was milk for breakfast required strategic planning because you could drive for twenty miles and not necessarily pass a grocery store.  And all of this was fine, normal.  Moving to college was the first time I'd ever lived in town, and I was the girl who frequently forgot to close the blinds before changing and was confused by the monthly test of the tornado siren.

If you've ever been anywhere near Minnesota, you'll know that distance is measured in minutes, not miles.  The next town is fifteen minutes away, the nearest (insert store) is a half-hour drive, and every college student live (insert hours) away from home.  We think of distance in the time we'll take out of our day and weigh the destination versus the worth of our time.

But distance is so much bigger and smaller than that.

Junior year of college, I started a relationship with a man who lived twelve hours away.  College was the first time I'd ever really been separated from people I loved, but it always had a deadline.  "I'll see you over fall break/Christmas/Easter."  That's not the way long-distance romantic relationships work.  I went 21 months without seeing my guy, and I got plenty of near-misses and disappointments.

My best friend leaves the continent in six days, just three days before my birthday.  It's the second time she leaves North America in a year, but this time, no one knows when she'll be home.  London is a long way from Minnesota, not that she was close to me when she was at home in Montana.  I know we're both going to have days where we suck at staying in touch, when we don't have the energy to communicate, where it just seems so difficult to stay close so far.  I've felt it all before, but every time, it's new.

Every mile is a pound of effort.  My daily life would not be possible with out cell phones, texting, and Skype.  I struggle with emotions that some people have been blessed never to experience, and some days they make it nearly impossible to crawl out of bed.  But the moments - the hello moments, the I-missed-you moments, the finally-able-to-touch moments - they are sweeter than any emotion you've ever felt.  Saying goodbye makes saying hello twice as sweet.  Every mile is a confused blessing.