Summer Reading, Part Two

I have been waiting a long time for a specific book to hit the shelves.  I'm one of those people, the kind that likes an author so much I stalk their website, looking for the release date of their next novel.  But, in the chaos of post-grad life, I completely missed the release date and didn't pick up The Moon and More until about ten days after it came out.  Even then, I was in the middle of another book, so I had to wait to catch up on the happenings in Colby until just recently.

Visit the website here.

I have been a fan of Sarah Dessen ever since her novel This Lullaby.  Although she is fairly famous for her earliest novels That Summer and Someone Like You (which were adapted into the Mandy Moore movie How to Deal), I'm not so much a fan of the books that came before This Lullaby.  As far as I'm concerned,  that's where Dessen hit her stride with YA fiction, with the notable exception of Lock and Key, which was a disappointment in the middle of a great run.

The Moon and More, like many of Dessen's books, contains cameo appearances of characters from previous novels.  Some might consider this cheesy, but I feel it's a brilliant move - we all know that pain of not wanting a novel to end, so why not give us a sneak peak back at the characters we love and how they're doing now?  It's set in the southern beach town of Colby, and centers around Emaline's struggle to deal with biological and step family, the start of college, her perfect boyfriend who just doesn't seem right anymore, the new guy, and the expectations everyone else holds for her.

With The Moon and More, I couldn't predict the end, and for most of the book, I wasn't sure how I wanted it to end.  Although the ending was someone reminiscent of Lock and Key, it was the perfect ending to a well-written story that made discomfort and embarrassment leap of the page.  I know this will be one of those books I hand down when I have a daughter.

Crisis Control

Lately, my life feels like one big crisis.

I'm juggling three jobs, we've been remodeling for weeks (truly, it's been off and on for a dozen years, but this is one of our on periods, which are always full of stress), and every time we turn around, someone is going to the hospital or having some kind of test done.

How most days feel.

Except I never look this classy.

The result is a sense of chaos, rushing, and constant worry about whether or not everything is being covered.

And, weirdly, I'm thriving.

Over the years, I've realized that I have two speeds: wide-open, and snail.  If things are going by slowly, breezing along, I lack energy and drive to accomplish anything.  As soon as life gets complicated, though, I'm at my best.  I speed from one thing to the next, trying to never slow down, and purposely taking on more and more responsibility until that moment when the day ends, and I crash like Rip Van Winkle.

It's a kind of adrenaline, and I'm a junky.  I love being able to take control, to fix things, to come out the other side victorious.  It's the buildup, the necessity of thinking on my feet, that makes me feel I've truly accomplished something.  And so, as I go into the next several days of unknown hours at multiple jobs, I wonder just how healthy my personality is.

Summer Reading, Part One

As I mentioned before, I am a big reader.  If I leave the house, I almost always have a book packed with me.  I choose my purse based on whether or not it can hold a paperback.  I have a section of my bookshelf dedicated to books I've purchased but not yet read.  It's a glamorous life of staying up later than I should, measuring daily accomplishments by how many chapters read, and making Post-Its lists of to whom I loaned which series.

Since graduation, I've already devoured seven books (that's a low figure for me, but I've been working, helping with our home remodel, and I didn't read over my five-day vacation). Most of them have been what I refer to as Semi-Trashy Romance Novels (distinguished from Trashy Romance Novels because the Semi-Trashy are historical, lending them a small bit of decorum).  Two of the novels I've read that fall outside this category were the first two novels in the newest Cindy Woodsmall trilogy.

Woodsmall writes Amish fiction, focusing on Amish life in the current time period.  Because of the Amish focus, Woodsmall's writing examines ideas of God, community, belonging, and the nature of modern living.  I find that, for many, these themes prevent books like Woodsmall's from even been picked off the shelf. 

The third book of Woodsmall's trilogy comes out in August.

Don't let that put you off right from the start.  Woodsmall's prose makes Amish life, language, and ideas easy to access, even for someone with no experience with Amish customs.  The ideas of God brought out in the characters' thoughts and speech are not the fire-and-brimestone that many people expect, but rather a gentle exploration of beliefs.  In the world of Christian fiction, Woodsmall creates beautiful settings and characters without trying to force her readers into a belief system.

A Heavy-Girl Conundrum

I'm not supermodel skinny.  I'm not even really anyone's version of skinny.  I hate throwing around words like chunky, heavy, fat, etc., because they mean something different to everyone.  If you're familiar with Gabriel Iglesias, I'm certain I would fall into the "big" category (If you have no idea what I'm talking about, start here.  This guy is hilarious).  I'm also a woman (for anyone who is making their first voyage here and/or isn't paying much attention), and women have gotten more and more "solutions" to body image problems brought about by being overweight, one such solution being our friend The Bodyshaper.

Picture from JC Penney

You could shop this things for days and not see the same one twice.  There's the brief, just for your butt; the old-fashioned just-for-the-stomach girdle; the bicycle short lower body shaper; and full-body shaper.  I probably even missed a few categories.  They come in every color, style, and price point.  Full-body shapers have as many strap styles as a Victoria's Secret multi-way bra.

I have friends that own Shapers, and I look at them every time I enter a department store.  Shapers are basically invisible under clothing while still managing to make you look lighter.  As a girl with large hips and a weird lovehandle-muffin top hybrid going on, I crave that smooth look.  But I just cannot bring myself to buy one.

Maybe part of my hesitancy is the desire to find that ever-elusive "right one."  But honestly, the idea of a Shaper kind of makes me angry.  I spent all my high school and junior high years fighting my body image problems through mean-spirited males, cheating boyfriends, and intentionally hurtful girls, trying to come out the other side where I can accept my body no matter how it looks.  I wouldn't say I've arrived at that point, but I'm closer, and I've also found a man who thinks I'm beautiful no matter what my weight.  There are all kinds of places to look for support in this journey (check out Brittany Herself--some days this blog saves me from myself).

The most amazing professor I ever had happened to be a non-skinny woman (who has whipped herself into a very healthy life by catching the running bug, a disease I will never suffer from).  I think her sole purpose some days was reminding me that my perfectionist tendencies are unhealthy and unrealistic.  Embracing flaws and problems is a process I started under her tutelage, and in that spirit, a Shaper just seems like giving in.  Maybe I don't have a perfectly smooth silhouette, but maybe that doesn't freaking matter.  Maybe it's just fine if I put on a jersey knit dress that clings to all my places whether society would label them good or bad.  Maybe I'd rather be authentic than perfect.