An Anniversary of Sorts

In less than a week, it will be one year since my college graduation. There's a part of my brain that doesn't accept this at all, insisting that twelve months have gone by in this flash of what feels like so much... Nothing. 

It seems like everything has happened to everyone else. My best friend is legally married (although the military means her wedding isn't until this summer). My other closest friend is working for AmeriCorps (I highly recommend) and has helped almost all of her students test out of needing her help. My brother and his girlfriend welcomed a stunning baby girl (and don't get me started on all the other people in my life popping out babies). Friends who don't even graduate college for another week have already accepted once-in-a-lifetime, following-my-passion jobs. 

It's hard to feel like you haven't gotten it right yet. Growing up, I was that girl that made all the right choices. When the girls in my class were out getting drunk, trying drugs, and getting pregnant, I was at home reading, studying, practicing, being bigger and better. 

It doesn't feel like it. Being back in my hometown, my tiny country town, means watching all these people I know make bad choices and still, magically, end up with all of the things I want but can't seem to get my finger on. 

And you know what? It's okay. 

Television, newspapers, bloggers, and more are slowly beginning to talk about post-college depression and how the current "real world" situation is making the transition difficult for grads. Everything from money and jobs to relationships and parents can make us feel like we're failing. 

But a lot of this we do to ourselves. We convince ourselves that where we are in the growth process isn't good enough or far enough. We tell ourselves we aren't doing enough, being enough, that we (or others) should be ashamed of what our life is right now. 

There's no shame in not finding a dream job the day after graduation. There's no shame in living with others while we sort out our finances. There's no shame in working for minimum wage. If we get up, day after day, and try – try something, anything that will make us grow, move us forward, or help us step up – even if we aren't striving for the things we planned on at 18, then we are succeeding. If you get an interview but don't get the job, you are doing better than some. If you live on Ramen while paying your loans, you have it better than some.

We cannot measure our daily lives by the big goals. We have to learn to measure  success by the daily achievements that get us infinitesimally closer to the big goals. Learn something about yourself, about work, about motivation, about others every day, and you'll get there. You will. Even if "there" changes by the time you arrive.